I try my best to blend in and be like other people, but it rarely works. The main problem is I regularly perceive things about others and the world that nobody else gets. Although such awareness has brought a lot of frustration, rejection and sadness, there have also been moments of incredible joy. Still, I am tired of feeling like such a mess-up compared to everyone else in the human race. It feels like my life has never really taken off as a result.
Not being "plug and play" in the standard, worldly sense is not necessarily a negative thing. In your case, for example, it reflects a greater awareness than most regarding where you came from, who you really are as well as your divine purpose in being here. Such knowing (because it has not been fully accepted or integrated into your life), has just temporarily hindered your adjustment to the earth plane.
Only through releasing such (fear-based) attachments to blending in and aligning with standard human consciousness, can full, clarifying awareness arise. Once that occurs, all pain and suffering in relation to feeling so different/incompetent will be transformed into profound thankfulness and joy that you are exactly the way you are as well as on earth at this precise time. The unique gifts and abilities you were created to express in this realm will also be fully revealed and released. Amidst such unfoldment, your life will not simply "take off"; it will enter the glorious stratosphere of a divinely guided existence.
Consequently, your inability to "blend in" was never the culprit. The real problem began with not trusting God's plan sufficiently - failing to believe you were uniquely designed to serve a high and Loving purpose and therefore such "differentness" is ALL good - good for you, good for the world and good for God!
For much too long you have been behaving like a gifted healer (with countless magical potions at their disposal) who shows up at a plague and then feigns illness in order to fit in. Fortunately for you, the "real patients" instinctively sense such playacting and generally exclude you from their inner circle. Take such rejection (painful though it personally may be) as a loving cue to step into your real destiny. The time has come to play the triumphant hero of your life's story instead of its passive victim.
Towards that end, cease working against type and instead look for ways to support your uniqueness (which is really about supporting God's plan and aligning with his will). Who you are and what you are here to do is much too important to be sacrificed on the illusory altar of worldly opinion, misguided self-judgment or paralyzing self-pity. At the highest level, you chose to incarnate on this planet to help others become more awake, aware and alive. That is the time-honored role of a mystic, not mess-up. In reality, the only way you could truly "mess-up" in this life would be to turn away from such a divinely inspired destiny!
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